I’ve
thought that a good (and hilarious?) high-art musical joke would be to do a
hip-hop track called ‘Jarndyce and Jarndyce’. It would take its name from the
hereditary legal case that runs through Dickens’s Bleak House. Jarndyce v Jarndyce drags on for several generations,
gradually consuming a large inheritance with legal costs. The same would be
true for the hip-hop track. It would obviously be a huge hit, generating tens
of thousands of pounds in royalties. None of these would ever be paid out,
though. The track would be crammed full of samples, deliberately targeting some
of the most litigious music catalogues. There would be some early Rolling
Stones, a bit of the Stranglers, several samples from Marvin Gaye, and some of
George Clinton’s work thrown in for good measure. The lyrics, too, would be
stolen from a variety of sources, including hip-hop artists who have suffered
their own legal misfortunes. The chorus would feature a number of interwoven
melody lines, each taken from the most obvious of hits. None of this borrowing
would be credited or cleared. ‘Jarndyce and Jarndyce’ would instead welcome
claims of copyright infringement. More than this, it would want to set the
various copyright owners in conflict with each other. The aim, ultimately,
would be to create a track whose shares are so complicated they are never
resolved. And while this conflict is in motion the song's royalties are
consumed.
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